雅思写作物种多样性消失会怎么样 雅思考试

　　  雅思写作：物种多样性消失会怎么样？雅思核心能力提升系列，作文大升级每天学习一点点提高英语不是梦
　　“作文大升级”（Major Essay Upgrade）每周三更新，题目取自雅思作文常考话题，对同学们的一个作文主体段进行修改，然后由小编给出范例主体段。目的在于帮助大家发现自己的作文问题并提升表达。想知道自己作文问题出在哪里吗？想了解怎么提升自己的表达写好作文吗？来看小编带你升级！
　　学习方法：
　　1. 阅读学生的初始版本，找出你认为需要修改的地方；
　　2. 阅读升级后的版本，并且读懂老师所作出的修改；
　　3.阅读范文版本，积累高分表达。
　　4. 针对该话题写一段自己的主体段（但不要使用范文观点）
　　Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems.
　　Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
　　初始版本
　　学生的一个主体段，主要论述生态失衡的坏处：
　　It is true that destroying the balance of Biosystems will have a detrimental effect on the whole community. Some human activities such as deforestation, logging for urbanization and killing of animals cause a considerable decrease in the number of plants and animals, while lands with dense vegetation and the existence of animals are the essential factors to keep the community bloomy and long-lived. If the trees and animals do not retain the biodiversity, some problems will occur such as land desertification or overgrowth of one species. As a result, this might bring a irriverserble environmental damage for our society.
　　升级版本
　　学生主体段的升级版：
　　It is true that destroying the balance of ecosystems will have a detrimental effect on the whole globe. Some human activities, such asclearing forests, filling wetlands,and converting wildlands to urban areas, cause a considerable decrease in the number of plants and animals, while lands with theexistence of dense vegetation and various animalsare the essential factors to keep the ecosystem bloomy and long-lived. However, if the biodiversity is not well retained, some problems will occur consequently,leading to irreversible damages to the environment we rely on. For instance, when animals and plants are losing their habitats and even become extinct because of deforestation, our agriculture will subsequently suffer from land degradationand even desertification.

　　1. and或or平行结构前后词形要一致
　　2. irriverserble单词拼错
　　3. 添加对比副词增强逻辑
　　4. 增添例子
　　5. 句子调整和升级
　　范文版本
　　老师的一个主体段，论述生态失衡的坏处：
　　It is surely acceptable that sometimes the extinction of a certain species occurs as a result of natural evolution, but the reason why species loss is a severe problem we face is that when the loss is caused by human intervention, it will eventually lead to catastrophic consequences. As is shown explicitlyby a large number of studies, ecosystems are delicately balanced by the coexistence of various animals and plants, while a seemingly negligible change, such as the disappearance of an insect, would have a ripple effect, bringing problems beyond we can imagine and control and threatening the entire, complex fabric of life, including that of us Homo sapiens. For example, a loss of a bee species can result in a lack of pollinators and thus a lower pollination rate, which causes a huge decline in seasonal produce and subsequently affects food supply.
　　高分表达
　　1. natural evolution
　　自然进化
　　2. human intervention
　　人类干预
　　3. catastrophic consequences
　　灾难性的后果
　　4. explicitly adv.
　　明确地
　　5. a ripple effect
　　连锁反应
　　6. theentire, complex fabric of life
　　整个复杂的生命结构